The story started in April, 2013 when an opportunity to deliver a project based on a software product called RHN Satellite from a company named Red Hat came along. Large companies use RHN Satellite for activities such as automated builds, patch management, auditing, configuration management, and other administration for Red Hat Enterprise Linux servers. Think of an IT shop that needs to roll out dozens or even hundreds of servers and set them all up the same way. Those folks need RHN Satellite.
I knew nothing about RHN Satellite, but I’ve earned a reputation as a quick learner and was confident I could master it. This would help a customer bring in an important project and make some money for me. A win for everyone. So I said yes. This is what the best IT consultants do; we say yes and we learn quickly. The job is not for the feint of heart.
There was a training class in Dallas with open seats coming in one week and I quickly signed up. Dallas is more than 900 miles away and I’m too cheap to buy expensive plane tickets, so I drove the 14 hours to the training site, attended the class and learned enough about advanced Red Hat Enterprise Linux system administration to deliver the project. I also invested in the certification test. If I’m going to learn the product, I may as well also get some certification credit for it.
Red Hat certifications are unique in the IT industry. While most IT product vendors offer certification tests based on cleverly worded multiple choice questions, Red Hat tests are all lab based. This means anyone who wants a Red Hat certification must demonstrate knowledge of that system by setting one up in a lab according to test specifications. The tests are challenging and very few candidates pass on their first attempts, even instructors who teach the courses.
Equipment problems in the Dallas classroom forced Red Hat to reschedule my certification test. I scheduled mine for July in Chicago and failed miserably. I improved in Chicago in October, but not enough to pass.
I knew what I did wrong and how to fix it, but the next scheduled test in Chicago was 6 long months away. Two other test sites had openings on Nov. 22. One was in Atlanta, the other in Ottawa, Ontario, Canada. The Atlanta site is 16+ hours away by car, the Ottawa site around 18 hours away.
I decided on the Atlanta site and planned to buy my seat sometime after Nov. 9 to maximize my credit card float. But the Atlanta seats filled on Nov. 8, leaving Ottawa as the only available Nov. 22 choice.
Ottawa presented a logistical challenge. Trips from the US to Canada require a passport and mine was expired. Minneapolis has a passport office and I could renew my expired passport by bringing it in with an updated picture and $220. But unable to find my expired passport, I had to start from scratch with a birth certificate from Idaho. To get a copy of my birth certificate, I needed an official copy of another piece of paper documenting my legal name change back in 1978. That piece of paper was buried in a vault and the only way to get a copy was a trip to the basement of the Hennepin County Government Center in Minneapolis, where the lady behind the counter said she would order it for delivery the next week. In a miraculous sequence of events, the process accelerated and by Monday, Nov. 18, I stood on the steps of the US Passport office in Minneapolis with a new passport in hand.
Only one logistical challenge remained – sign up for the test in Ottawa. But now, after spending hundreds of dollars and watching a logistical miracle unfold around my passport, all the seats in Ottawa were full. I called Red Hat and talked to Lauren with the training group. Lauren orchestrated another logistical miracle to add an extra seat, and I reserved my seat in Ottawa a few hours later.
Now the real work – prepare for the test, travel to the site, pass the test, and go home. Air travel cost between Minneapolis and Ottawa started at roughly $1050, confirming my decision to drive. The test was Friday morning, so I was on the road from Minneapolis by 4:45 AM Central time Thursday. I arrived at the Stardust Motel on Carling Road in Ottawa at 11:15 PM Eastern time, 17 1/2 hours later.
Canadian customs officers have ultimate power at the border and can deny entry to anyone they want for any reason they want. My trouble at the Sault St. Marie border crossing started almost immediately as I rolled down my car window and handed a lady in a little booth my passport.
“And what brings you to Canada today?”
“I’m taking a test.”
“How long do you plan to be in the country?”
“And where is this test?”
“It’s in Ottawa.” (I think alarm bells started going off her head.)
“Let me get this straight. You’re driving all the way to Ottawa to take a test, then you’re turning around and going home?”
“Yes, that’s right.”
“You are aware that Canada is a sovereign country, right?”
“Uhm, Ok.” (Not sure where she was going with this.)
“And you know Ottawa is 11 hours from here, right?”
“Well, Google maps tells me it’s about 9 hours, but OK.”
“So why are you taking this test in Ottawa?”
“Because the site in Atlanta was full.”
“What is this test anyway?”
“It’s for advanced Linux system administration.”
“Advanced what? Why are you traveling to a different country just to take a test?”
“C’mon, What foreign country? This is Canada. We’re friends. ” (Note to self – Canadian customs agents apparently don’t like appeals to friendship.)
“When was the last time you visited Canada?”
“Uhm, well, I guess it’s been a while. Why?”
“OK, you need to park right over there and go inside for more questioning.” (Uh-oh. This can’t be good.)
She directed me to a parking spot where several people in uniforms waited to escort me inside.
One of my escorts asked me what documentation I had to prove I really was going where I said I was going. Thinking about it, I only had some emails. I could open them on my tablet so I brought it in with me. Maybe the emails would satisfy them. I’ve been to former communist countries with less hassle.
I watched car after car after car easily cross into Canada while I slowly walked inside the building, flanked by uniformed guards as the clock and my upcoming night’s sleep ticked away. Walking in the building, I saw 5 more people in uniform behind a counter on my right laughing about a video on a computer screen. They sent me to the farthest counter, where a fat, gruff, balding grey haired man in uniform talked to a group of three people. As I approached the counter, he ordered me to step back and sit down at a table and wait.
“They told me to go to this counter.”
“And now I’m telling you to sit over there and wait.”
“If it’s all the same to you, I’d rather stand and stretch if I have to wait.”
“Suit yourself, I’ll be back after a while. Don’t come up here until I tell you to.”
And then he left with the three people trailing. I stretched my legs and back, stiff after 9 hours of driving so far that day, thinking about the 9 additional hours still to come and the clock ticking while I waited on the Canadian government.
The officers watching the comedy video barely looked up. I asked one if he could take care of whatever it was I needed to take care of and he said no, that guy was the only one who could do it. My only option – cool my heals and wait.
I needed to pee.
After a few minutes, Mr. Authority returned, motioned me up to his counter and asked me what was going on. I gave him my passport and then made my next mistake.
“The lady outside hassled me and told me I need to come in here and take care of it.”
Major mistake. And then I made it worse.
“She didn’t hassle you. You said you’re here for work so she sent you in here. That’s what she’s supposed to do! Do you think we just let anyone in our country who wants to come in?”
Dumbfounded, I said, “I see at least 10 cars out there and they’re all flowing right through.”
“THEY’RE ALL CANADIAN CITIZENS AND THIS IS A SOVEREIGN COUNTRY! SO HOW ABOUT I DON’T LET YOU IN THEN? YOU JUST CAN TURN AROUND AND GO HOME, HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT?”
I wanted to walk outside and survey the license plates on those cars passing through the border, but a little voice in my head told me to shut up before I got myself into more trouble. This guy controlled what I needed and I had nothing he wanted. He had all the power and I had none. He was the master and I was a dog. Time to become meek and beg for mercy.
“I wouldn’t like that at all. I’ve been up since 3:30 this morning. I just want to get where I’m going, take my test and go home.”
“WAIT RIGHT HERE.”
He took my passport and disappeared into a little back room. He came back out a few minutes later.
“Ever been convicted of a crime?”
I was about to say “speeding tickets”, but my literal answers had already gotten me into trouble. Speeding isn’t a crime anyway. So I answered, “No.”
“Ever been denied entry into any country?”
“Not until right now, no.”
“Show me this proof you’re taking some sort of test in Ottawa.”
I showed him one of the Red Hat test confirmation emails and he said, “That doesn’t say it’s in Ottawa. What else ya got?”
“Uhm – well, here, take a look at this email.” I brought up an email thanking Lauren for opening the additional the seat for me.
“I never heard of any company named Red Hat. What do they do?”
“They’re a software company.”
“Where are they?”
“They’re in North Carolina and they have offices all over the world.”
He looked me over one last time.
“OK, I’m going to let you in. BUT YOU NEED TO WORK ON YOUR ATTITUDE!”
“Thank you.” (resisting the urge to further express my feelings.)
“Go give this paper to those two standing over there and be on your way.”
I still had to pee, but not bad enough to ask anyone here to use a bathroom. As the uniformed guards escorted me to my car, I asked if any of them wanted to search it. They said no and I drove away. Welcome to Canada, eh.
I passed the test. I’m now a proud holder of a Red Hat Advanced Linux System Administration Certificate of Expertise.
Total cost – $480 for the November test, $480 for the October test, $2800 for the original training and test, about $400 for the passport and required paperwork, 4 trips to the Minneapolis passport office and Hennepin County Government Center, around $1000 for travel costs for the training and test trips, 36 hours behind the wheel for the round trip to Ottawa, $40 per month for upgraded cell phone service in Canada and Mexico, sore legs and back, and a lesson in humility from some Canadian border agents.
Hopefully it was worth it.
(Originally posted on my Infrasupport website in Nov. 2013. I backdated it here to match the original posting. At the time of the original posting, my one person company was a Red Hat partner. I am also now a Red Hat employee. Everything in this post is my own opinion and may not reflect what anyone at Red Hat thinks. Life goes on. That test I worked so hard to pass back in 2013 is now obsolete.)